Don't you mean Jessica Rabbit and Winnie the Pooh?
Roger Rabbit (Good Idea) – Becky Hollada
Who Framed Roger Rabbit is a movie all about mixing worlds. It also combined the real and cartoon worlds to create something that few people today would have a hard time not recognizing. Since Disney Infinity’s core concept is creating something new by blending bits and pieces from Disney’s trove, a Roger Rabbit themed play set would fit right in.
Literally.
Roger Rabbit comes with a combination of two separate worlds mashed into one that creates the perfect playground. Players could run through the vibrant, wacky Toontown or skip around Hollywood during its Golden Age. It’s a world with endless possibilities and enough bad puns to put Animal Crossing out on the curb.
Every boy, man, and even some women have one thing on the brain with this play set: Jessica Rabbit. Jessica is probably the only character from the movie more iconic than her husband and would easily be a fan favorite. Beating other folks with Rapunzel’s frying pan or a flamingo croquet mallet? Of course. This was the woman who hid a bear trap in her bosom. Who wouldn’t want to hear her signature line after laying someone low: “I’m not bad. I’m just drawn that way.”
Plenty of Power-Up discs could come from this set as well. Portable Holes to drop anywhere and everywhere like the new motion-sensor mine. Benny the Cab, for those times when you need a ride that does almost everything a Bond car could. Also who wouldn’t want all the pianos and safes that you can carry, or drop on people?
With a few less sex jokes and swear words, Roger Rabbit could finally see some more screen time as part of the Disney Infinity cast.
Winnie the Pooh and Friends (Bad Idea) – Kimberly Keller
With over ten movies, a ride with lines out the door at Tokyo Disneyland, and even a Taoism book based off the silly old bear himself, Winnie the Pooh and his friends are a marketing empire in their own right. These characters are so familiar to millions young and old that it would seem a natural choice for Disney to pop out some figurines so everyone can run amok in the Hundred Acre Woods.
I actually really enjoyed Pooh’s special world in Kingdom Hearts, so it’s pretty easy to imagine them all CGI-ed up. His sense of innocence and curiosity was a nice break from the game as I made new, endearingly hopeless friends and helped them get through life one day at a time. So yeah, I can see a play set based on the stuffed critters and their adorable misadventures.
Except not. The play set will be fine, maybe unbearably cute (ba dum cha!), but once that bear and his friends enter the Toy Box things get a little twisted. Picture our little rotund Pooh-Bear, or better yet, tiny little Piglet, button eyes wide and full of wonder… wielding Stitch’s Blaster, or better yet, beaning people over the head with Carl Fredricksen’s Cane. He’d probably have to jump just to reach his enemy, coming down with force and fury.
Go
home Pooh. You're drunk.
The only one I can picture to an extent is Rabbit. He’s a sourpuss most of the time anyway, why not take it a step further and give him a weapon to ward off potential enemies of his vegetable garden? Then again, do I want to see Rabbit with Ralph’s Power of Destruction? That is way too much power for such a short fuse.
Looking even further at the other Power Discs, somehow picturing Rabbit (or any of the gang) riding Tantor, or one of the horses, is just… weird, somehow.
So please Disney, don’t mess with our lovable willy nilly silly old bear and his pals. He’s just not ready to play with the big kids.
Images courtesy of Kimberly Keller and Jason Pelmont.
