When they say life comes at you fast, they aren't taking the eShop's terrible latency into account.

I am incensed. I am bewildered. I am awake, well beyond my bedtime, unable to calm a mind poisoned by confusion.

I was in the eShop, minding my own business, trauma-dumping dubious products into the Nintendo World Report Discord (join today!). I consider this a form of ablution; I behold the inexplicable, and I then cleanse it from my mind by delivering it to you - our unsuspecting readers.

In recent memory, Nintendo never reveals their full year as of January 1.

I felt a major sense of deja vu recently. "Nintendo has nothing for this year!" "Switch is going to be barren after May." "We only know of five games Nintendo's bringing to Switch!" "When's new hardware?"

Those kinds of sentiments fill the Nintendo discourse every time the calendar changes years.... Read more...

Or “Nintendo, can I please get my weekends back?”

One of the fun features of the website is that it preserves the Talkback threads in the article proper, basically serving a function of a comment section but with actual moderation. Recently, friend of the site Syrenne took time out from her vacation to dig up this psychopathic comment from a 2010 blog post (yes, we had blogs at one point) by Neal called “This Week In Awful Downloads” and drop it in the Discord:

A lengthy list of games played and games not played.

For close to a decade, I’ve kept a running list ranking my favorite games of the year. I add new games as I play them, idly tinker with it once every month or two, and sometimes make big swings when a game turns sour over time or I find myself returning to it more than I expected. It’s a fun exercise... Read more...