Hard situation to be in Stephanie. Not really an easy choice. If I was in your place and you felt that your safety was in jeopardy if you showed your true self then I would try and find a place to live independently. If that was the case then if you might consider moving. There are lots of protections and laws in these cities in Nevada. Enterprise, Las Vegas, Paradise. Reno is another option and it is pretty close to Northern California and the resources there.
If you do decide to rip the bandaid off it is a good idea to have a safety net under you. Like friends you can stay with, support groups and legal info if things turn bad and you have to leave. It really isn't an easy situation to be in I am afraid to say.